Sunday, June 24, 2012

One year later!!

WOW!!!  I have not written a blog in over a year!!!!  That is unreal!!!  I will never do that again.  There has been way too much that has happened for me to back track, so we will start from present day. 

My husband and I are doing pretty good.  Yes, we have had our ups and downs, but overall, the marriage is a happy one.  I still have my frustrations, but I try to pray through them constantly.  In nine days, our family will be leaving for Tampa, Florida, for two days, and then we will sail on Carnival Paradise for five days to Cozumel, Mexico.  I am so excited because I have never been on a cruise before.  Neither has my parents, my sister, or my little man.  We wanted my brother to go, but since he has hooked up with his voodoo queen in Louisiana, it seems as though he has become more and more distant from us.  He dropped a bombshell on us about a month ago and informed us that he would be moving to Louisiana, and his intentions are to take his children with him.  I can't see that happening because my sister-in-law, although she hasn't admitted it, is probably going to move to Virginia, and take the children with her.  Personally, I believe the children are better off with my husband and I, even though I know that is not an option.  My brother is brainwashed, and he wants his children to grow up to believe as he does.  I'm not even sure if he believes in Jesus Christ anymore, but I do believe whatever religion he is attached to is nothing short of a cult following.  I do not want my niece and nephew being raised in that type of environment.  Additionally, his pretend wife ( I call her that because they claim to be married, even though he is still married) already has four children of her own.  How can they afford to support six children when she works at Radio Shack and my brother won't have a job?  Also, Louisiana has by far the worst school system in the nation, along with one of the highest poverty rates and crime rates.  My sister-in-law is no better.  Someone evidently told her that she is America's Next Top Model, because she dresses like it.  Expensive shoes, clothes, earrings, and purses, yet your children look like they are homeless.  She never bathes them, and my niece's hair is horrendous.  I constantly pray because I don't know what the future holds for any of them.

My little man will be six next month!!!!  I can't believe it!!!  He has grown to be a very handsome and intelligent little boy.  He is full of energy with a vocabulary that has me scratching my head at times, and I love him more and more every day.  I pray for him and all children to continue to do as God sees fit, and to keep a level head on their shoulders throughout life.  I also pray for my step-sons, because for their ages, to me, they are very immature.  The oldest one tries to be a thug, but he fails miserably at it.  He has a gun, and thinks it's cool.  He drives too fast and blasts his music way too loud.  Oh, and did I mention he is a father?  The little girl is five-years-old, and sometimes I feel as though he tries to throw up in my face that she is my husband's heart.  Yeah, she is his heart alright.  The first time that little girl came over to our house was Memorial Day.  We never see her when we travel to see his family, but she is his heart.  No, there are jealously issues because of my son, but do you know what I say to that.....SUCK IT!!!!  Bring your daughter around more often and she might have his heart then, but until then, he can kiss my grits.  My husband's sons think that they are my son's age sometimes, I promise you.  The youngest one is in college and is a preacher-in-training, yet he is the most irresponsible person I know.  He has two jobs but he never keeps any money, so he calls his Dad to help him out.  I can understand once in a while, but gee whiz.  He just had to go college after dropping out five years ago, but he should have gotten a job, and gone to either night school or online school, like we all have had to do.  But oh well.  I try to stay out of it, because it's not like I don't love them, but to me they use their Dad, and when they use him, they use me.  Plus, they have their Mom, but she doesn't do anything to help so there goes that.   

Thankfully, my sister made it home from Afghanistan.  I miss her terribly because she is now stationed in South Carolina, but I would much rather have her there than overseas.  Her retirement is nearing in a couple of years, and I can't wait!! 

My parents seem to be doing okay, but I still experience pangs of anger and frustration because sometimes I secretly wish that my mother had not taken my father back for the umpteenth time.  I also feel as though my brother took some negative traits from my father as far as how my father treated my mother.  But, I have to let that go and only hope that my husband continues to be the best possible father to our son that he can be, along with being a good husband for me. 

Aside from all of that, I am still employed as a deputy sheriff, and I celebrated (HaHa) my five-year anniversary in April.  I am thankful for my employment, but some days I feel as though I can do better.  But I have to get that degree in my hand, which I am 49 credits from obtaining. 

Whew!!  That was a lot, but I am going to try to write at least once a week so that I don't have to play catch-up too many times.  Until next time...... 

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